Several weeks ago Alan Jamieson's book 'Churchless Faith' arrived from Amazon. I haven't read it yet, but came across a list of his findings. Seven things people leaving church wished their church had done/been to help them stay involved:
1. Provide places to explore, question and doubt.
2. Include a theology of journey.
3. Understand the leaving process.
4. Offer assistance in our faith struggles.
5. Model other theological understandings.
6. Focus on realities rather than 'shoulds'.
7. Have more room for emotions, feelings and intuitions.
Alan also wrote an article titled 'Ten myths about church leaving', a 'must-read' for church leaders. I believe churches could greatly improve in this area if they would only have honest 'exit interviews' with the people who leave.
Another Kiwi who published about the 'out-of-church' fenomenon is Andrew Strom. He says:
"The surprising thing is that church leavers are often the most committed kind of Christians - praying, insightful, deep-thinking. Yet they have grown tired of 'playing the game' inside our church system and have opted out. Often their involvement goes back many years. In fact, they had commonly been leaders of various kinds. But the LACK OF GOD is what gets to them - even in our most 'Spirit-filled' churches. And so quietly, sometimes without anyone even noticing, they slowly slip out the doors - never to return. Some have even told me that they felt God 'calling them out'. Others simply felt they couldn't stay there anymore. The state of the church weighed upon them more than words could say.
"Most of these people have not given up on Christianity at all. It is today's church system that they have given up on. Some of them have started up home-fellowships. Or they meet with other couples on a casual basis. But many meet with nobody at all, and they consider themselves in a 'wilderness' place - alone with God. I was asked several weeks ago by a pastor whether I agreed that what is happening could be a 'move of God'. That is a pretty radical thought. Many leaders would think the opposite. Because anything that leads people out of 'their church' can't be of God, can it? Hmmmm. All I know is this: The concept of going through a 'wilderness' just before entering the 'Promised Land' is totally Scriptural. In fact, it is right through the Bible. Even Jesus went through such a wilderness time."
I'm kind of surprised about the comparison made between people who choose to leave the church (who choose a life of isolation and self-seeking rather than connection and service to others) and mother Theresa.
...unless I'm missing something?
I can see where some leaders would burn up after a while and even grow bitter. However, in my humble opinion, the problem is that some of the most active members of the church get tempted and trapped in a performance based life. We do live in a task-oriented, achievemet based world, and we do tend to be "of the world"—at least in that area. Our schedules get so full that we don't have the time to listen to God's voice, connect with others, and relax. Or maybe, somehow, in the process, we tend to forget what it is all about. Sometimes, we get more attached to our ministry/leadership role and forget about calling. We get so task oriented, duty focused that we can't give glory to God anymore.
Church is not a factory in which to make Christians. We are not just molding people into various shapes, cleaning them, pooring knowledge down their throats.
That's my personal take.
Ideally, none of that would be true. Ideally, people would be well-connected, in deep, meaningfull relationships, helping others in various roles as needed. Ideally, ministries would be about glorifying God and serving people as God leads. Ideally...
Unhappily, the local church isn't perfect—just like the people who form it.
However, I do believe that church is what God chose to bring good to the world. I do think church is about personal transformation in close relationships with others. We were made to be connected. We were saved to be transformed into Christ-likeness and to do good works that glorify God.
...and when I feel down, I have doubts, or I am lonely, there is probably someone in the body of Christ looking forward to spend some time with me and help out... Or at least someone else who feels the same. Because ultimately, God cares about His sheep, and wants them together, in one flock.
May God bless you, dear reader.
Posted by: Adrian Agapie | May 10, 2006 at 03:37
Hi Adrian,
Please note that leaving organized church doesn't mean leaving THE church or living without Christian fellowship. It just becomes more organic and liquid. There are many groups outside the organized church that function more as church as Jesus intended it than what we're used to call 'local church'. It's time we redefine church!
The contradiction you make (who choose a life of isolation and self-seeking rather than connection and service to others) is an unfair one. Most people I know personally who left organized churches journey in fellowship with others, and are certainly not self-seeking. In fact, realising that many of the organized churches are maintenance-oriented, one could as well say that these churches are therefore self-seeking.
You might be interested in a more recent update on 'A Churchless Faith': http://marcsmessages.typepad.com/mm/2006/04/a_churchless_fa.html
Posted by: Marc | May 10, 2006 at 17:34